Sports Are Great! But…

I have a few complaints about sports.

First, sports have become too overanalyzed. I remember growing up that there was a bunch of pre-post game coverage of the big games, like the Superbowl, NBA Championship or World Series. But now, there is pre and post coverage of every meaningless game of every sport. There a fucking million analysts with little to no insight. We need to stop supporting the mindless drivel of excessive sports coverage (Jim Rome)!

By biggest pet peeve is meaningless statistics. There are two types of meaningless stats that bother me. The first pointless statistic is the ones that point out the obvious. For example, you will hear an announcer say “The Giants are 5-0 when Eli Manning throws for 400 yards and the Giants have at least 5 sacks.” Really? No shit? You mean to tell me that when you move the ball up the field well and stop the other team you tend to win? Wow, what a revelation! The other type of statistic is the arbitrary one. Occasionally in some pre-game shit you’ll hear something like “When Kevin Garnett scores with 8 minutes and 5 seconds in the first quarter the Celtics are 9-4.” Great! So how the fuck does this provide an insight or strategy?

Another thing that bothers me is the weekly countdown to game time. I don’t need to hear more about the above useless statistics or watch some fucker in Indianapolis grilling hotdogs and cooking ribs before the game.

The post game analysis has gone to far as well. Sportswriters and broadcasters are always trying to make sense of the game. One team just scored more than the other, usually because they accomplished their objective in the game, and the other team did not. One team shot better, or got more stops, that’s it! We don’t need to hear more analysis, especially, in sports like golf. You either hit the ball in the hole or you didn’t. No need for analysis. Often, after a game some broadcaster will come over to Phil Mickelson or whoever and say “So, tell us about the shot.” He made a put! What more is there to know?! Phil or whoever will respond with some generic, “Well I know I have strong competition on my heels so I tried to focus and sink the put in order to stay ahead.” Really?! You mean you weren’t trying to miss? Great insight (fart noise).

Yet another thing that bothers me is the maximization of TV time. The NBA is the worst in this regard but other sports due this as well. We don’t need a week off between games so we can have coverage of games outside of our conference. The NBA wonders why the rating are down, it’s because they’ve watered down the product.

And speaking of watering down the product, the changes in sports regarding decreasing contact and increasing scoring suck! In the NBA you can’t take charge anymore. Also, in the NBA, if you foul someone above breathing on them it’s a technical foul. And on that topic, this roughing the QB and punter in football sucks as well. A guy is in midair, jumping at the QB attempting to sack him and the QB decides to release it. The defenders really don’t know what to do and often, tries to avoid contact. What is the defender supposed to do; change direction in midair a la the Matrix?

The complaining to the officials and excessive celebrations are too much! In the NBA players whine for 10 minutes (Rasheed Wallace) after ever call. It slows down the game and nobody cares. In football, a guy will make a tackle on a running back that ran the ball for 5 yards. Often, the guy who made the tackle jumps up and down, does something strange like pretend to churn butter, and runs down the field like he won the superbowl. Calm down! It’s the 1st play of the 1st quarter and you didn’t do anything that great.

I love sports! But this shit has gone too far. I know this post makes me sound like part grandpa Walter part Annie Wilkes, but I needed to get this off my chest.

Vote - Best Facial Dunk!

These two dunks are my top two (and I think I gotta go with KJ by a nose). Consider:

- Both were made by little guys over big guys. (6'3" over 6'9", 6'1" vs. 7'0")
- Both big guys were known at the time as very good / great defensive players.
- Both were in the playoffs.
- In both cases, even though the big guy was not directly guarding the dunker, he was there in plenty of time to help. (In other words, it wasn't some cheap "I dunked on you, even though you weren't really there" like the time Beer-on-the-Girl got dunked on by Biggie Sessoms at Amman Park.)

Anyway, which one is better? Is there another one better than both of these?











And here's a trio of Vince Carter dunking on people, lest anybody think I'm biased against him.

Sports Squads Sellout?

As at least three-quarters of you readers know (which I'm confident is at least 6 people), I grew up in North Jersey, which is part of the New York City media market. As such, myself and most of the people I grew up with became fans of the New York-area teams. With all of the major sports, you had your option of two or three teams. Fun debates then arise: Mets vs. Yankees, Giants vs. Jets, Knicks vs. Nets, Rangers vs. Devils vs. Islanders. In each of the major sports, I find myself aligning myself as such:

Baseball: Personally, I found myself preferring the Yankees over the Mets, though I never truly thought of myself as a die-hard "Yankees fan". I've found it hard to be a die-hard fan of a sport where there is a 162 game regular season. Furthermore, I find it hard to get behind a team who buys success by outspending all the other teams. Now, I don't blame the Yankees for doing so - they should use their resources - it's just hard to get enthusiastic about a system where one team has all-star level talent at every position while others are forced to continuously auction off all of their promising young players for economic reasons. But I digress.

The biggest my level of fandom got for the Yankees probably came during my senior year of high school (1993-1994). My friend Chahifquoy would come by from time to time, we'd order a pizza and watch the Yankees play. This was when they were becoming resurgent again after years of being mediocre. I even had a Matt Nokes replica jersey (though, in retrospect, this was really random, I had to be the only guy who had a Matt Nokes jersey, and nobody but hardcore Yankees fans would even know who that is, as the Yankees didn't but names on their jerseys then (and still don't). He was the catcher


The aforementioned Matt Nokes. How many people could possibly have a Matt Nokes card? He caught for the Yankees during the early 90s.

Anyway...

Football: I was never really a "fan" of either NYC team, though if pressed on the issue, I probably slightly preferred the Giants over the Jets. Most Sundays if I sat down to watch football growing up, I would watch the Jets at 1 and the Giants at 4 (or vice-versa), and would want both teams to do well. My father grew up in Chicago and thus was indoctrinated as a Bears fan. Thus, whenever the Bears came on TV, and especially when they were good in the mid 80s, I'd watch them play and root for them. I still have my Walter Payton replica jersey in the closet somewhere. But I was pretty open about football, and just liked the games in general regardless of who was playing.

Hockey: I didn't know dick about hockey. I do wonder how people that we grew up with were Rangers fans, as opposed to Devils fans, when the Devils were good all of our lives, and were in our backyard. Though, I suppose somebody from another part of the country would ask the same thing about the Nets. Speaking of those Nets...

Basketball: This was the one sport I was very passionate about. In high school I became a die-hard Knicks fan. I taped many of their games from 1992 - 1995 or so when I wasn't home watching them. This was back in the days of Ewing and Oak, Mase, Starks, SWISH! Those gritty Knicks fighting against Jordan every year, finally making it in 1994 only to lose to Hakeem and the Rockets.

1994 did seem like the year, though, until the end. Check out this video:



Wow, haven't the 90s become dated quickly?

Anyway, it is interesting how people in North Jersey and NYC pick their teams to be loyal to. Most people who are, say, Yankees fans can justify it to you, can tell you when they became a fan and why, and why they prefer the Yankees over the Mets.

But, I think that it's generally accepted that people choose a team in their local media market to become a fan of. After all, the local team is the one that has all of their games aired and is discussed in one's immediate surroundings. And, if you choose to be a "fan" of a team that is not shown and covered locally, you almost have to have some other reason, like a family member who grew up a hardcore fan of some other team.

(Side note: Has that changed with the introduction of the major sports having sports packages where you can view any team's game in any part of the country? In other words, let's say you're a kid who grows up being able to watch any NBA team play because you have the direct access cable package, and you elect to watch Lebron James instead of your local team and you consequently become a Cavaliers fan, is that somehow less valid than being a fan of your local team? Does this need to be justified to one's peers?)

Ok, so what's the point of all this? Well, you see, I've been getting a lot of shit for switching allegiance in my sports teams. I lived in Northern New Jersey for the first 23 years of my life, then lived in the New Brunswick area, which I would describe as somewhere between Northern and Central New Jersey, for the next 6 years, and have spent the last 4 years living near Philadelphia in Southern New Jersey. Since I've set up shop down here, I've gotten into the local professional teams as follows:

Baseball: I'm still not a huge fan of the sport, but I do find myself now rooting for the Phillies, feeling sorry for the Mets, and having disdain for the Yankees and their ridiculous payroll. I don't feel like this is selling out in any way. I find the Phillies to be an easy team to root for.

Football: South Jersey is crazy for their Eagles. I have gotten swept on in this and watch a decent percentage of the Eagles games, hoping (futilely, so far) for their success and for an eventual championship.

Hockey: Still don't know dick about hockey.

Basketball: This is the big issue. I have completely lost my loyalty for the Knicks and thus, almost by default, have found myself lightly rooting for the Sixers. The Knicks have become a joke of an organization, and I found myself having no problem ditching them and moving on, especially when my local media covers the Sixers and they have become more interesting. I would say that I'm a bigger fan of the NBA, in general, than any one team, though it used to be I would say that I was a "Knicks Fan".

The point of this long post, though, is not to inform you of the history of which teams I like and don't like. Here is the question that I do want a serious answer to:

If you move from one city to another, how much time has to pass before you are allowed to switch your sports allegiance to the new city's teams? Are you ever allowed? Does it depend on other factors other than time passing? If so, what are these factors?

My New Team

I've lived in South Jersey, in the Philadelphia area, for just over three years now. Growing up in Bergen County, my main sports allegiance was always for the New York Knickerbockers. I would "follow" the Yankees and Giants for stretches of time, but my heart wasn't into them and I wouldn't call myself a "fan" of either team. However, even after I moved down here, I've been purchasing the NBA League Pass package so that I could watch my beloved Knicks stink it up (along with following the guys on my Fantasy NBA team. I'm embarrased to admit that, but it's true.) The main drive, though, was to watch the Knicks games frequently and the Nets games from time to time.

However, as we face the dawn of the 2008-2009 NBA season, I sadly have to announce that I believe - and this remains to be seen - that my time with the NY Knicks is done. They have been too mismanaged for too long, and there aren't many likable characters around. They are a bloated, overhyped franchise which has been heading in the wrong direction for several years now. And so, finally at my wits end, I've realized that I don't really want to order the League Pass this year. It's not a money question - it's a "I really don't want to watch the Knicks anymore, so why do I need League Pass?" feeling that my heart is conveying that I have to acknowledge. And consequently, that means that my allegiance may wind up switching to...

... the Philadelphia 76ers. They are a fun team to watch. They have a bunch of good young guys who, unlike the Knicks' guys, have been given a chance to develop and the team is seeing the results. Then, during this offseason, they addressed one of their biggest needs, a post-up presence who can score, by signing Elton Brand who is a perennial All-Star when he's healthy. Philly is a good sports town, all their teams are successful... and hey, when in Rome...

Look, I'm not consciously doing this. This is very hard for me. This is a guy that used to tape most of their home games in the early 90s (while I was in h.s.) and rewatch many of them. However, unless something changes in N.Y., my time with the Knicks may be over. I'll have to see what my heart tells me when the season starts. This could be very bittersweet.

Random Notes 9.14.2008

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WNBA Brawl

I'm usually of the opinion that, in most cases, any publicity is good publicity in the worlds of sports and entertainment. In this light, I don't know if this brawl that occurred in the WNBA last night was necessarily a bad thing for the league. ESPN was talking about it. That can't be all bad, right? I mean, when your goal is to get people to watch your game?

Michael Vick

Damn... talk about a fall from grace. Anybody remember that this guy is serving two years in a U.S. Penitentiary?

http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=3477573

As a side note, I had a surprisingly hard time spelling "penitentiary".

Barry Bonds

Now that this Barry Bonds saga is hopefully working towards a conclusion...

I feel like this persecution of Barry Bonds is a little ridiculous.

First of all, why did Congress ever get involved with baseball in the first place? I've never understood this. It's a fucking SPORT! Why don't they hold a Congressional hearing to investigate the steroid use in professional wrestling next? Our government wastes far too much money and resources over stupid shit. Like Dave's account said in the movie Dave of the government's budget, "If I ran my business like this, I'd be out of business."

Anyway, regarding how baseball ought to view his record and his legacy in general, I think the backlash against him wasn't because of his ethnicity or because he's an asshole to the media - I think there's this backlash against him because of his success! I mean, when McGwire and Sosa broke Maris' record in that famous summer of 1998 that basically brought baseball back into popularity after the strike in 1994 and everything, people were able to turn the other cheek because (1) people were watching baseball again and (2) Roger Maris' record being broken didn't really bother people because other than having that record, Roger Maris was not in the pantheon of great baseball players.

But, Barry Bonds happens to be an unbelievable, all-time-great talent without the steroids. With the steroids, he was superhuman. Forget about the all-time homeruns mark - he won 4 straight MVP awards and set all kind of new precedents. Refusing to pitch to a guy often? Amazing. During that stretch Barry Bonds would get walked in ridiculous situations because they were afraid to pitch to him. He'd get walked in tie games in the 6th inning with runners on first base. And it wasn't a bad idea either!

(Infact, I think that when teams use this strategy it should be called the "Barry Treatment". Like, what the Giants did by not kicking to Devin Hester this past Sunday - they gave Hester the "Barry treatment".)

In any case, my point is: Barry Bonds is no more or less guilty than Jason Giambi, Mark McGwire, Roger Clemens, Sammy Sosa, etc, etc... he's just much doper than them. If we asterisk or erase or whatever his records and achievements, then lets erase everything about Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa from MLB history. So for people that care emotionally about this issue, you've been turning your cheek for around 15 years or whatever... Barry Bonds just did it better than all his peers.