I still loosely follow New Jersey politics since moving to Boston. NJ’s Governor is a man named Chris Christie; however, I call him Governor Krispy Kreme. Governor Kreme has been the Governor of NJ for approximately one year. I truly do hate this fat sack of shit! Here are some of the many reasons why Krispy is a fuckface and just a bad Governor! (Click on links for actual news stories)
1) He failed to secure federal education dollars: The federal government sponsored a “Race to the Top” in which States were able to apply for federal education dollars based on innovative ideas in education. Krispy’s appointed Education Commissioner improperly filled out the form, and poof, 418 million dollars in educational aide from the fed was gone. Krispy blamed “government bureaucracy” because the evaluator of the applications didn’t tell him that NJ forgot to fill out a section of the application. Hey Krispy, it’s called a *competitive* grant, meaning, an evaluator scores your application. If you don’t fill out a section, the evaluator can not give your State an unfair advantage by assisting NJ to get more points on the application. Despite not securing these funds he bitches about teachers salaries every 2 minutes, and that really is every two minutes, no exaggeration.
2) He cancelled a tunnel that would connect NJ to NY: Not only was it bad enough that Krispy cancelled a construction project that would have created many jobs in a bad economy, and would have helped to ease congestion between NJ and NY, he was apparently unaware that he would have to pay back the federal dollars that he took for this project. So, poof, good bye to another 271 million in federal funding for the project.
3) Created a ton of new advisor positions in the Office of the Governor : This is not a big deal in the abstract, but coming from a guy whose whole platform is the government spends too much, adding bull shit positions for your wife’s friends seems to be hippo-critical. (get it, Hippo?)
4) Complains about excessive government spending every two minutes, but stayed illegally at five star hotels when he was a federal prosecutor. Not much to say about this, but his excuse for staying at five star hotels while staying in Boston and D.C is that he was “not familiar with the area.” It’s called Google, Krispy!
5) Bitches about the Union for spending too much but wants tax breaks for corporations: This is a personal hatred, but I hate it when rich fucks complain about spending, and then want tax breaks for themselves.
6) He appointed a woman as Commissioner to the Department of Children and Families who advocated for sex with children: Granted this is an oversimplification, but Christie ousted a Commissioner who had great statistical success with the Department in favor of a new Commissioner, not knowing that some of her research including the impact of adults having sex with children, and finding that the impacts were not that detrimental to children. Not someone who you want having as your Commissioner in a Department charged with protecting abused and neglected children.
1) He failed to secure federal education dollars: The federal government sponsored a “Race to the Top” in which States were able to apply for federal education dollars based on innovative ideas in education. Krispy’s appointed Education Commissioner improperly filled out the form, and poof, 418 million dollars in educational aide from the fed was gone. Krispy blamed “government bureaucracy” because the evaluator of the applications didn’t tell him that NJ forgot to fill out a section of the application. Hey Krispy, it’s called a *competitive* grant, meaning, an evaluator scores your application. If you don’t fill out a section, the evaluator can not give your State an unfair advantage by assisting NJ to get more points on the application. Despite not securing these funds he bitches about teachers salaries every 2 minutes, and that really is every two minutes, no exaggeration.
2) He cancelled a tunnel that would connect NJ to NY: Not only was it bad enough that Krispy cancelled a construction project that would have created many jobs in a bad economy, and would have helped to ease congestion between NJ and NY, he was apparently unaware that he would have to pay back the federal dollars that he took for this project. So, poof, good bye to another 271 million in federal funding for the project.
3) Created a ton of new advisor positions in the Office of the Governor : This is not a big deal in the abstract, but coming from a guy whose whole platform is the government spends too much, adding bull shit positions for your wife’s friends seems to be hippo-critical. (get it, Hippo?)
4) Complains about excessive government spending every two minutes, but stayed illegally at five star hotels when he was a federal prosecutor. Not much to say about this, but his excuse for staying at five star hotels while staying in Boston and D.C is that he was “not familiar with the area.” It’s called Google, Krispy!
5) Bitches about the Union for spending too much but wants tax breaks for corporations: This is a personal hatred, but I hate it when rich fucks complain about spending, and then want tax breaks for themselves.
6) He appointed a woman as Commissioner to the Department of Children and Families who advocated for sex with children: Granted this is an oversimplification, but Christie ousted a Commissioner who had great statistical success with the Department in favor of a new Commissioner, not knowing that some of her research including the impact of adults having sex with children, and finding that the impacts were not that detrimental to children. Not someone who you want having as your Commissioner in a Department charged with protecting abused and neglected children.
I could give more specific examples, but the overall reason I hate this guy is he’s such a blowhard. Tony Soprano had a great line to someone when he described the aggressive nature of someone of the phone as a “telephone tough guy.” To me, this describes Krispy perfectly. An example of this is he rightfully objected to NJ contributing to costs for the Tappen Zee Bridge construction, but then, has to make statements like “I’m telling NY to stop messing with us!” Calm down tough guy. In addition, he’s on TV and in the newspapers everyday talking about superintendent salaries; meanwhile he makes twice as much as most of them. He’s such a grandstander. I would love to get him alone so I could punch him in his fat face!
1 comment:
Heh heh... "Hippo-crite".
Great post. This Christie is a douchebag and amazingly, his approval ratings are apparently just fine.
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