Pumping Gas in New Jersey

The other day I pulled up to a gas station. The attendant was having an animated cell phone conversation, which apparently was more important to him than giving service like the young men who darted over to the car in Back to the Future when Marty first hits downtown Hill Valley in 1955. Anyway, I waited for a little while patiently, and finally said to myself something like, "I'll count to 20 and then I'll get out of the car and say something." Fortunately, he promptly hung up, jogged over and apologized (at least I think he did, his English was a bit unclear) and then we proceeded with our transaction ("Fill it, regular, cash." "Ok, boss.")

But, it got me thinking: it's silly that I can't just get out of the car and start pumping my own gas. As I'm sure you know, it is legal to pump your own gas in other states. I've filled my own gas before while travelling, as I'm sure we all have, and I seem to have the hang of the whole process. Must be some insurance thing, I wondered. If somehow I was to injure myself while pumping the gas, the gas station must be liable.

So later, our of curiousity, I consulted Google. Turns out, NJ is one of just two states where it is *illegal* to pump your own gas. Yahoo! Answers, umm... answers below:

The Garden State is one of two states where it's illegal to fill 'er up yourself. Only gas station owners or employees can pump gas in New Jersey and Oregon -- "the only two states atavistic, sadistic, and masochistic enough to still require thousands of 'professionals' to waste time, money, and inconvenience customers," according to one columnist.

The ban on self-service gas stations is a highly combustible issue and makes for some heated debates. New Jersey passed the law making it illegal to pump your own gas in 1949. At the time, legislators felt it was too dangerous to have untrained people dispensing such a flammable liquid.

That may have been sensible at the time, but pumping gas is much safer today, and some motorists feel the ban is outdated and needs to go. Opponents of the law argue that removing it would lower the cost of gas and make refueling much quicker and more convenient. Proponents of the ban argue that it creates jobs and customers like full service.

Ahh. So it creates jobs. But wait, doesn't that cost the gas companies money to have people manning the pumps? And if it does, would they just charge the higher amount anyway and pocket the profits? Or would it be cheaper for us? This article from three years ago addressed these issues (as well as containing the awesome Beavis-and-Butthead-esque line "Fear of putting it in the wrong hole?"), pointing out that elderly or less mobile motorists rely on not having to get out of their cars. Maybe true, but how do they manage in the other 48 states where they must pump themselves? Why don't New Jersey gas station offer two lanes, "pump your own" and "full service" and charge people like 3 cents more per gallon for "full service"?

I wonder what the real deal is, and why this has not been rectified yet.

Jizz in my Pants

Haven't seen this until recently. It's funny.




It reminded me of this...

Scott Howard for Finals MVP

Now this is fucking funny.

Math Questions II and III

First, the answer to the previous Math Question, as Pax and Evan answered, is 50%. Here's why:

The probability of the team of at least one run is 100% minus the probability of the team scoring no runs. There is a number of ways in which the team can score no runs. Let O be a strikeout, and H be a hit.

- The team can get three strikeouts (OOO). Probability = (1/2)(1/2)(1/2) = (1/8)
- The team can get three strikeouts and one hit in three ways:
HOOO, OHOO, OOHO. Probability of each: (1/2)(1/2)(1/2)(1/2) = 1/16. Probability of one hit and three strikeouts: 3 * (1/16) = (3/16).
- The team can get three strikeouts and two hits in six ways:
HHOOO, HOHOO, HOOHO, OHHOO, OHOHO, OOHHO. Probability of each: (1/2)(1/2)(1/2)(1/2)(1/2) = 1/32. Probability of one hit and three strikeouts = 6 * 1/32 = 6/32

Probability of no hits: 1 - ( (1/8) + (3/16) + (6/32) ) = 1/2 = 50%.


Now, here's two more math questions:

Math Question #2: What's the most amount of money that a contestant can win on a single show of Jeopardy!? Assume that you can place the Daily Doubles wherever you want.

Math Question #3: Can you guarantee a tie in Tic-Tac-Toe for X? For O? How is it done?

Sean Hannity is an asshole

Incase you haven't been following, Keith Olbermann calls Sean Hannity on his willingness to be waterboarded. Watch.





I would gladly hit Sean Hannity in the nuts with a hammer and have no remorse about it. Nice, Keith.

Weird Al lA drieW

I'll post the solution (and an extension question) to the recent math question once ChuckJerry responds.

In the meantime, though, how had I never seen this Weird Al parody of the Bob Dylan classic until I accidentally stumbled onto it on YouTube while looking for the original Dylan video?

Math Question of the Day

Suppose a baseball team has hitters who only gets singles or strikes out. Suppose further that when a batter gets a single, if there is already a man on first base he advances to second base, while any runner on second or third base scores a run. When a batter strikes out, any players on base stay at that base. Finally, suppoe that all the batters have equal hitting ability. If the probability of each batter getting a hit is 50%, what is the probability of the team scoring at least one run before having 3 outs?

Mob Movie Monday

A magnificent... err... triuMvirate of memorable mob movie moments for your viewing pleasure.

I guess I'll hold off on my King Lear joke next poker game

PREFACE: There are many intelligent, clever people who are regular poker players. This post is not a put-down. That said...

There are two guys who host poker games in Southern Jersey, "Mike" and "Jim". They coordinate the games and are permanent dealers. Mike's games are Monday, Wednesday, and Friday nights at his house while Jim's are Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday at a different location. The games are both in towns in Camden County, and Mike and Jim are buddies. Presumably, this way people could play every night and each game would not draw people away from the other game. I usually play at Mike's house. However, I have been to Jim's a couple of times and therefore, I am on both of their text message lists. The scene at Mike's house is very friendly (even when it's for big money), and everybody chats and jokes throughout the games.

About two weeks ago, Jim's text messages started becoming more frequent and insistent. He started to advertise games every night, including the regular nights at Mike's (M, W, F). I found this strange and continued to stay loyal to the game at Mike's house.

So last Wednesday I show up at Mike's game, get settled, buy in and grab beer / food, and say... "Hey, Mike, did you know that Jim has started to text people about having games on Mondays and Wednesdays also?"

"Yeah, [Walt]. I got those texts also."

"Are you cool with that? I mean, don't you guys compete, in a sense, for the same guys to show up on weeknights?"

"Kind of, but not really. I mean, as long as we each have enough guys to play it's cool. The groups really are kind of separate. It was weird, though. The first thing I texted him back when he started having those games was, 'Et tu, Brute?'"

I start chuckling and the other seven guys at the table are just staring at Mike. Another player says, "What does that mean, Mike?"

"What, 'Et tu, Brute'?"

(Me: ) "Well, it's from Caesar. It means..."

I go on to explain the context of the line in relation to Julius Caesar, and how Shakespeare immortalized it, and I realize that about halfway through I think I lost them at Julius Caesar - as in, the only two Caesars these guys know are the big statue at the casino in Atlantic City and the salad dressing.

Feeling like an intellectual snob, I let my voice trail off and Mike continues to deal. The image of me being the only guy appreciating Mike's reference highlighted by the blank stares after his line makes me chuckle still.

It reminded me of the time during the summer when I sat down to play in a poker tournament in Bally's in Atlantic City. I was running late and got there just before they started. Everybody is in that quiet couple of minutes just before the dealers start the tournament and I get settled. I am wearing a t-shirt entitled "The Mathematicians". This is what is looks like.



So I sit down and nod hello. A 40-something guy across the table, in a Soprano style accent, goes, "Ey, what's on your shirt?"

I look down to recall what shirt I'm wearing, and the table all looks to check out the shirt. I say, "It's 'The Mathematicians.' It's just the faces of a bunch of famous mathematicians throughout history."

The guy just stares back at me and goes, "Oh."

Me: "Yeah. So..."

The guy: "Cool. I thought it was like an album cover or something."

Me: "Ha. Yeah, no, just some mathematicians."

Thankfully, the dealer started the tournament and the conversation ended. I felt like an intellectual snob again.

It's quiet again.

Random Notes 3.28.09

- Earth Hour is today. It's in the papers today and was promoted by the Environmental Club at my school. There are several crucial environmental issues that we, as a global community, must start addressing now. So, therefore, I think this a nice symbolic idea.

However, why don't we shoot a little higher, like maybe not use unnecessary power for an hour every day? Or three times a week? Or, just don't use it unless it's necessary? Something that will actually make a difference? People are amazing. We do things like Earth Hour to "raise awareness" and then there's no follow-up. Why isn't recycling mandatory? Remember Earth Day starting when we were in high school?

And, remember the Kyoto Protocol that George Bush wiped his ass with? (Yes, I understand that he didn't want to sign something that China could ignore, effectively increasing their economic strength, but, isn't that a little... immature? Shortsighted?) Well, in a few months, there's this. I hope we come through this time. I know everybody's (rightly) worried about the economy... but think about how disastrous economic issues could become if, say, one day a few years from now New York City is 4 feet below sea level [or, insert health-related-concern-which-is-a-result-of-human-actions-on-the-environment here].

(By the way, I don't actually really know much about the environment or about the politics behind it. This is just a rant, expressing that George W. Bush and Co. certainly had the public appearance of not caring much about environmental issues, and whether this is true or not, we need to both change perception of environmental issues, and obviously actually do something about them!)

Anyway...


- The Harlem Globetrotters' theme song, Sweet Georgia Brown, has become a favorite of our cockatiels. I need to figure out how to shoot a video of them going crazy whistling back to the whistling song and post it on YouTube. That's my next project (that is, once I get posting regularly here down.)


- I've been into March Madness, but didn't fill out a bracket this year. The story lines that have kept me going are that Villanova is doing well and is local, and I love watching Blake Griffin (he'll be an NBA all-star within 5 years, barring injury). The tourney certainly does lose some excitement if one does not have money riding on who wins. However, having not filled out a bracket this year, I realized something (and this is not mock everybody who has one done - if my work had one going I would have done it): How do people actually place so much stock in their picks? How many co-workers or friends have you heard discussing brackets and say things along the lines of, "You know, I actually like Mississippi State over South Carolina in an upset. They're tough." It sounds pretentious and there's no way that anybody who lives in New Jersey has seen most of the schools in the tournament play more than once, if at all. I've done it myself, every year. I realize later that I'm just regurgitating sound bits I've seen on Sportscenter, either consciously or subconsciously, which is whatever everybody probably does - or just reads blogs somewhere to obtain their opinions.

This is not to be a killjoy. March Madness is one of the best annual sports spectacles we have in our country, if not the best. I just think people should just be like "Why did I pick this #13 over this #4? Fuck it, I wanted an upset and I know that (school in #13 position) was on ESPN a few times this year. Plus, my girlfriend's cousin goes there" rather than try to justify it with some manufactured knowledge of either school.

That being said, it's dope that Obama filled out a bracket.


- Check out Bob Dylan's discography. He put out 8 dope albums in his first 5 years! Well, his debut Bob Dylan was ok... but the next 7 are amazing through John Wesley Harding. Artists these days aren't as prolific. So did the Beatles - Rubber Soul, Revolver, Sgt. Pepper, White Album, and Abbey Road are were released in like a four year span. Artists seemed to go on hot runs in the past - I also think of Led Zeppelin's early years (Led Zep I - 1969 through Led Zep IV - 1971) and Stevie Wonder's run of amazing music which was five great albums from 1972's Music of My Mind through 1976's double album Songs in the Key of Life. Is music just too commercial these days, and designed solely to make money? Do record companies not want to oversaturate the market with music from one artist, or of one genre? There must be great musicians these days (and there are) who I'm sure wouldn't mind releasing album after album in a few months time.